Category Archives: teaching

Glugs Wine, Listens to Silence

Are you Tuned in?

Just imagine being together as a family and really listening to each other, responding, and emotionally tuning in. Can you hand on heart say you do this, that nobody is distracted by anything else going on? You are truly present and in the moment… ah nice.  Then the kids have a disagreement, it escalates, and it all goes horribly wrong, (keeping it real) and it does, let’s face it.  What do you do in the eye of the storm – mum or dad in the middle?  Is their argument a result of unresolved conflict,which the kids are too upset about and maybe too immature to let go of.  Perhaps, they haven’t had a space to talk about their upset or be listened to?  Does it ever feel just a little like groundhog day?

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Decline in Listening Skills 

Research has found a significant decrease in children’s listening skills over the past decade,  can you guess why? I wonder too if this doesn’t apply to adults and sitting together as a family.  I’ve put together a ‘listening’ programme which  I’m sharing with the children and colleagues  I teach alongside  in school.

Meanwhile, parent(s) finishes meal and glugs more wine and enjoys listening to silence, and tunes out. Silent is listen rearranged.

What do you DO after a family UPSET, how does it leave you feeling and what’s that like?

What do you Need?

How do we create time for family connection, spaces to talk to one another and be heard?

Today, just become AWARE of the above.  And Pause. (a previous blog about Pausing) .  I have a photo of an owl, which reminds me to  listen, notice and be wise. Often, I think of the owl when I have a quiet time or meditate. Perhaps imagery will help you too?

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I’ll share listening ideas on my social media page this week. @FrustrationExpert

I hear you

So right now what do you need? What can make family life calmer?

Each month, I’m  creating a regular morning of family connection which will respond to your needs and those of your  family, it will be ‘agile’ and ‘flexible’ and at the moment in Guildford, venue tbc. I hear you.

What do you like best?

What could help you to disconnect from all the busyness of life, to be more present and bonded as a family? Have a read of this link here  and see what you like best about the mornings. Come along with your children to learn some of these simple skills and take them away to use with your family between sessions. You will feel more relaxed, more present to listen and this will filter across family life. Plus they’ll be ongoing support for you between meet ups. If your children prefer not to join you then come by yourself, as I’ll share ideas for you to use at home. 

Seeking Open Hearts & Curious Minds

Please do share this with any family you think would benefit from joining us. I’ve not specified ages, just a willingness to give it a go with an open heart and curious mind.

Jane x

#frustrationexpert

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‘Miss, The Elephants’

Ladybird Ladybird 

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‘Please put that back where you found it,  hurry up and get back into line,’ words shouted to a 6 year old child in a school I was teaching in a while ago. The little girl had a ladybird in the palm of her hand and was showing it to a friend.  She set the ladybird free and lined up in the straight line with all the other children.

‘Miss, the elephant’ 

A teaching mentor once advised me ‘Don’t be the teacher who misses the elephant walking past the classroom’

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When I was teaching in Tanzania, we often had monkeys visiting the classroom, no matter how many times they came in to steal crumbs from the floor the kids got distracted and excited. At the time, I was also studying to ‘BE’ a mindfulness teacher and completing a yoga teaching course, so despite feeling irritated,  I reminded myself to be present with the experience, have a 10431412_10152530791344789_4232260385897800258_obeginners mind with the visits and to see them through the children’s fresh curious eyes!

The children also used to love the large birds that perched on the telephone wires outside and sometimes we’d all just stand by the windows watching them. We’d find out what they were called, researching the photos in our small collection of bird spotting books and of course if the electricity and internet were working we’d use google.

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Lessons From the Ladybird

After the ladybird was set free,  I went back to class to tell my children about it and found out what they knew about them.  We looked at photos online of  different ladybirds, found out where they lived,  counted the different spots and introduced the word symmetry, little children love big words and there’s so many avenues still to explore. We added this learning to the slug, snails and power ranger interest zone.

Monkey Minds

Often I talk with the children about their busy monkey minds, and teach them ways to settle and calm ourselves, largely because I ‘need’ them to be quiet on the carpet.  Kids are naturally curious, playful and present, are we teaching them to be busy, distracted and stressed?

I Missed the Elephant

Whilst typing this I forgot to pay attention, the birds have been singing outside all the while and I didn’t notice –  I missed the elephant.

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Seize the day.

A PLAYce to BE

I’m facilitating a PLAYce to BE You on the 14th October at Clandon Wood near Guildford in Surrey. You might like to join in and notice the beautiful nature reserve with us. Why not come along and take a couple of hours out to just BE. Info here. 

If you would like me to come and talk to your organisation about simple ways to get present, please email me jane@janetyson.co.uk.

#frustrationexpert

Your children can learn simple ways to be calm, connected and emotionally balanced

Your children can learn simple ways to be calm, connected and emotionally balanced. It is very easy to do.

The State We Are In 

Recently I visited a school and Brownie Pack.  I shared ideas with the children of ways to create changes of ‘state’ in our minds and bodies and how we get in a state in the first place!

Wired Or Tired?

I taught them how to create more energy and enthusiasm when they feel tired and ways to be calmer when they feel wired.

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I was able to demonstrate how self-talk influenced their results. Words they say to themselves influence how they feel and how their body  also has it’s own language which influences them both negatively and positively.

Give Me Five 

These are some of the techniques I shared with the teachers and children in school today which you might also enjoy at home. It takes just 5 minutes here and there…

Just Listen Sitting with legs crossed, Close your eyes or gaze at a spot on the floor and just listen to the sounds in our bodies then take this listening to sounds which are nearby and outside.

earSome of the children sat quietly and others found it hard to be still and quiet,  with regular practice children notice more sounds and sit listening for longer periods of time. It’s also good to write down the sounds and see over time how many more can be added to the list.

Walking Tall –walk tall with smiles on your face. When we meet each other, stop, breath and smile.

This activity was fun for the children and helped them to enjoy and notice each other more and gain awareness of what was going on around them in the present moment. They got ‘present’.

Body Tapping – tap your bodies from head to toe and then use an imaginary sponge to rub your arms, backs, tummies, legs and feet and noticed how your bodies tingle afterwards. Notice how this improves your circulation, raises your energy levels and wakes you up.
This is a great exercise to do in the mornings.

Movement – I weaved in a yoga story too with 5 simple moves, I’ve written about ways to implement yoga into family life before here

Square breathing – I drew a square on the board, at home I draw a pretend square on my children’s backs, and then I traced along the square with my finger and as I did this we breathed in slowly for 4 and out for 4, this can be repeated for as long as you like, there are no rules.

After each exercise I asked the children and teachers to notice how they feel. Some said they felt calmer, relaxed and sleepy whilst some said they didn’t feel any different. There are no wrong or right answers, it was for them simply to bring awareness to the experiences.

So you probably now realise how simple it is for your children to learn how to be calm, connected and emotionally balanced and just how easy it is to do. And when we do these activities alongside them we create this in ourselves too.

How I Help Adults & Children Relax

I support schools, businesses, families, children, groups and individuals who are feeling frustrated. I am presenting a talk entitled ‘How I Help Adults and Children Relax’ on the 6th June in Guildford details here,  a Contented Parenting workshop for frustrated parents in September details here  a Mindfulness For All session here and co presenting with AyPee a Social Media support session for people frustrated with Social Media  in September.

JaneTyson.co.uk

 

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Hishy, Hashy, Hoshy

A Random Diablog

Laughter, Play and Poetry

I am an IamBic Master Practitioner –  IamBe was the goddess of Laughter, Play and Rhyme,  I’ve written about her before here. My Communication and Connection Model is based on these principles with metaphorical flashing!  For may years I have explored the benefits of  ‘play’ in both little and big people and most mornings I set an intention to be playful and to not sweat the small stuff.

This week, I found a vintage red suitcase in a skip, I’m often on the look out for them,  it was a bit rusty and tired but it was perfect for my random lifestyle.  Inside were a few vintage books including  ‘Indoor & Community Games‘ by Sid G Hedges 1943, an exciting find (do I need to get out more?)

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Connection & Communication Through Play

Since the introduction of the PS4 games console in the house, there has been a lot of falling out over fair usage, screen time – ‘it’s so unfair our friends get to play on it all night’ and when they do come off there’s noticeable irritability and stress and this coupled with a hormonal pre-teen. Later today, when my husband returns we are having our weekly family meeting about the best way forward with these frustrations.

The kids and I have been having a lot of fun reading the book and playing some of the simple games. They have relaxed and connection and communication has been restored. They’ve just walked to Sainsburys together too, hopefully they will sustain this friendship on their adventure and not part company in the frozen ailse.

Enjoy these Games 

Here are a couple of the simple games we’ve explored and enjoyed –

Giant Sneeze 

Split into 3 teams and appoint these 3 names – Hishy, Hashy, Hoshy
Count to 3 and then call out the name assigned to the person or team in unison and loudly to create a giant sneeze!

Laughing Game – Rollicking Fun! 

‘Someone of merry disposition is chosen to lead the game and sits in the middle of the room. He tosses up a handkerchief and immediately breaks into a rollicking laugh. Everyone else must laugh too, and the laughing must continue as long as the handkerchief is in the air. But the instant that it touches the floor every face must become stern again, and anyone who shows even the slightest trace of a smile is compelled to drop out of the game. The handkerchief is then thrown up a fresh and the game goes on until all the players have been disqualified’ 

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I love this smelly old random book, it’s going to continue to be played with.

Jane x

It’s free to join our meet up group, come and play!
See also my Twitter video about this – @JaneTyson

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What’s in Our Hearts – Creating Deeper Connections

In tomorrow’s playful Movement, Mindset & Mindfulness session especially for kids –
 
🌟🌟🌟What’s in Our Hearts – Creating Deeper Connections to Ourselves & Others 🌟🌟🌟
 
Children will –
 
  • engage in circle time with story telling, positive self talk and neyoga-for-kids-feb-to-march-posterws sharing
  • notice how to ‘globally’ listen
  • explore further ‘personal responsibility’
  • create heart maps of the people, places and things they value and love most
  • develop a deeper connection and understanding of ‘self care’ in order to enhance their relationships with others too
  • learn more about growth mindset and brain plasticity
 
Plus child led games, yoga, QiGong and the odd mindful bundle
 
Saturday workshops especially for teens coming soon.
 
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#iambe #LWWDEvent #RandDialEvent

Shrove Tuesday – Do you give a Toss?

What is Shrove Tuesday?

Going through this week’s calendar and getting organised, I note it’s pancake day on Tuesday. I’ve taught the meaning of this to kids over the years in different schools, and remember that the word  shrove is linked to being shriven from sin. In past times there was a call to confession with the pancake bell.

Fasting

Some research suggests that people used up their store cupboard ingredients in the pancakes,  so they were eaten before the 40 fasting period of Lent. Other reading points to the ingredients having pagan symbolism.

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I feel so bad

In my youthful, naive, fresh teaching days I used to talk to the children about giving up things for Lent, ‘so kids what are you going to give up, what sins/wrongs are you committing that need to be put right?’ now I’d say ‘what’s going right for you that you could explore further, what value could you add to others?’

Stop beating yourself up

Giving up things just makes us think of them even more and we might even start to crave them and then feel ‘bad’ when we give in.  I’m rather bored of either feeling good and bad and hearing talk of feeling guilty because I ate this or did that. I’d rather not teach kids to beat themselves up. Let’s teach them about balance.  I wrote about a blog about developing an abundance mindset here.untitled-design-5

How can we ‘add’ more value?

My 10 year old daughter sometimes tells me she’s fat. I’ve been so careful about only celebrating our bodies, I’ve never spoken of going on a diet or asked whether my bum looks big in this.  Yet she’s picking up messages about image from all around – school, the TV, books etc. I ask her what can she do more of that’s good for her, what does she enjoy, what makes her feel good and importantly I need to role model this myself. 

Happy Tossing.

Movement, Mindset and Mindfulness Classes for kids starting on Shrove Tuesday – Movement, Mindfulness & Mindset for Kids

Jane x

 

 

A Bored Book.

A ‘Bored’ Book

How many times a day do your children tell you they are bored?

Maybe you have children who can easily entertain themselves, and spend the day just making, creating and playing, I’d really love to hear from you for this idea.

I notice that if kids are on their computers, tablets, phones, PS4s etc they never seem to tire.  It’s when they come off them that they find it hard to transition from this over stimulated time to a space where they now have to do something ‘boring’ instead.

Screens produce an experience we can’t recreate

I read once that when we are on our screens, certain chemicals are released – maybe it was dopamine or seratonin – that can’t be recreated in the brain at the same levels once we come off.  For example, as a teacher, I cannot replicate the multisensory stimulation that a screen induces, hence children don’t always listen so well, sit still, retain information and they get bored quicker, however if I put on a YouTube clip explaining the same thing, they are all eyes, ears and interest for a long time, it is their language.

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This photo was taken when we were in Africa. These kids played and collaborated endlessly with the tyre, they had no screens.

What do kids do when they aren’t on screens?

My son had a friend over, they’d had some screen time together and the hour timer was up, so after a few reminders they came off and didn’t know what to do. They asked to go back on again and we said no that they could go and find something else. This  quite often means they go round the friend’s house to play on the screens there instead.

It took them about 10 minutes to transition to outdoor play and they soon found themselves engaged in a nerf gun war, followed by fire building with Paul in the garden. With the screens off, they had to find something to do, it’s so easy though sometimes to just let them go back on again and loose track of time. They might mope about inbetween waiting for their next fix.  Meanwhile, we also bury our faces in Facebook, Twitter, Gmail etc, driven to distraction.

Why are we so Bored?

We know it’s good to be bored, creativity often stems from boredom and head space. Why though are we so bored? Some say we are over-stimulated, the more we have the more we need and it’s hard to put up with the slow stuff in between. Are you reading this whilst doing or thinking about other things at the same time?  Or maybe it’s too long and boring to even read. Our kids are no different.

A ‘bored’ book for kids written by kids.

I’d like to create an e-book of ideas for kids of things to do when they aren’t on their screens. I’d love your children to contribute to this please, and if they are willing to, could you share their ideas in the comments below with an image if possible of the activity.  I’ll obviously give them a credit.  All ages welcome.

Things to do that are free, with little or no adult intervention.  I wonder if we they can come up with 3 or more boring ideas?

Jane x

janetyson.co.uk