Category Archives: Iambe

Remote Controlled Connection

How our Children can teach Us to Relax

Yesterday my son was talking to me (well at me), we were on our way to karate and he was really excited about moving up a level to ‘spar‘ and spent a looooong time telling me all about it.   I was distracted, my mind was elsewhere on work and actually hands up, I was a little bored of listening!

My Boy-Man Brought Me Home

I took a breath and acknowledged to myself that I wasn’t with him and set an intention to BE present and enjoy his company, despite the uninsparring conversation.

I parked the car,  looked at him and checked in to where we both were,  I breathed with him and tilted my head to match his tilt, I listened to his words and brought myself to the present moment and engaged more with his  excitement and enthusiasm, I noticed my 12 year old boy-man.  I became present to BEing  with him, I sensed his energy and he bought me home again, we relaxed together, his conversation slowed and he noticed me too.

JaneTyson.co.uk

Remote Controlled Connection

Tonight he has been teaching me how to play a PS4 game called OverWatch and again I was rather distracted and keen to get on with making tea! I once again connected with him and enjoyed his joy at spending time with me, and just how excited he was to teach me how to be in his virtual world and once more guide me out of mine.

Come learn how we use our BE SAY DO HAVE Ⓒ model and join in the conversation –

ContentedParenting

Do you have Spring in Your Step?

A Spring Clean from the inside out

Many of us will be moving into Spring expecting to be full of energy and enthusiasm, however the reality is we are still often dragging along Winter baggage, such as coughs, colds and a few extra body pounds, just in time for the allergy season to begin too!

If you’d like a little more spring in your step – try some of these –

🌟Warm Lemon Water
Upon waking and before eating sip warm water with a the juice of 1/2 a and a little honey – this has lots of benefits including encouraging your skin to glow, a shot of Vitamin C, a digestive aid, good source of potassium and it keeps us hydrated.

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🌟Keep hydrated all day
Filter water into jugs at the start of the day so you can see how much you are drinking. Pour this into bottles and carry them around with you, have one in the car one in your bag, don’t leave in the sun though. Don’t like water? – try adding adding a squeeze of lemon, orange or cucumber slices.  Alternatively drink herbal teas.

🌟Body Brushing for a Spring Glow
Give your skin a gentle body brush starting from the knees up, brush upwards towards the  heart and if you don’t have a special brush use a dry flannel to kick start this morning habit. Body brushing helps to improve circulation and cell renewal, shed dead skin, adds a healthy glow and stimulates lymph drainage and the removal of toxins. Ideally do this for 5 to 10 minutes a couple of times a day.

🌟Self Massage
Gentle self massage is also great, you can do this with or without oils. If you do use oil use a light one such as almond mixed with grapefruit oil for improved circulation. Massage as many bits as you can reach – gently knead, twist, pat, stroke and brush. Remember your hands, feet and face too. Even better if you have a little helper, my daughter and I really love to massage each other’s feet at bedtime.

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🌟Move your body
Get out and walk and notice the Spring as it moves forward. Observe the blossom leaving, the leaves appearing, new flowers blooming and the light changing.  Maybe take a sketch book and draw 5 new things you notice, they can be rough sketches nobody will mark you. Or simply pause, breathe and and just spend some time in nature, your garden may even suffice.love spring

🌟Enjoy Yoga
Particularly sun salutations and detoxifying twists.
I’ve written a post about yoga simple ways to weave it into homelife and family too – here. I’m an Iambe practitioner and this can include teaching kids and their parents simple fun family yoga poses, so let me know if you’d like me to come over to share some Spring Asanas with you!

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🌟 Explore QiGong
It’s pretty simple to learn, excellent for developing concentration, physical strength and energy,  perhaps try the 8 Brocades for starters.  I love QiGong outdoors and in, you’ll find plenty of videos on YouTube to practice and again it’s something you can fit in around children if you are a busy parent.  I try to learn a sequence then have a go at it on my own at home or even when I’m out walking in nature, just short simple sequences here and there.

13876592_1220304914667564_8596789861692689881_n🌟Meditate
Cross your legs or sit upright in a chair. Either gaze at something on the floor or close your eyes. Have a little check in with your body and where you are in the space in the room, allow yourself to settle a bit.  Now, notice the Spring air breath as it comes in through your nostrils and out again.  Each time your mind wanders away, which it will do, just gently and kindly bring it back again to the breathe.  Sit like this for a while, I like to set a timer for 20 to 30 minutes and do this first thing in the morning before everyone is awake. You may like to try it out on a walk, find a place to sit and be still and quiet. When you have finished notice how you feel. Create a daily habit.  If  you need any guidance let me know as I’m trained to teach mindfulness and happy to share it with you for free.  You may also enjoy this post.

🌟Reduce oily foods
Look for fresh seasonal foods – my kids are enjoying radishes at the moment in salads and with humus, a good Ayervedic Spring recommendation along with garlic, chillies and spring greens – which they aren’t so keen on! Minimise sweet, salty foods, caffeine and dairy, not so easy over Easter but that’s OK you can allo17202923_628588677340922_3634881168588647173_nw yourself to indulge it’s about finding balance.   I did once pick nettles at the allotment and created a Spring nettle soup from a Hugh Fernley recipe, it was much tastier than expected, the kids surprisingly enjoyed it too!

🌟Breathe
Take 3 long slow continuous deep belly breaths now – out with the old and inhale the new.  Right nostril breathing is also warming – I’ll share a video about this soon on my Facebook page

🌟Air your mattress 
Turn it over and even treat yourself to some new bed linen. According to Feng Shui principles, making our beds each day is important as it’s a way to declutter and put a positive Spring spin into our day.

🌟A Spring Declutter
Tidy one drawer for starters – get rid of what doesn’t serve you, or bag it up and put it in the loft if you can’t bear to loose it. Now clear another drawer …  This is a great way to mentally declutter too.

🌟Dust if You Must – Clear away the cobwebs physically and metaphorically.  Some people like to burn sage around the nooks and crannies of their homes.

I’d love to hear what you like to do to help keep you mentally, physically and spiritually energised and on top Spring form. Please do comment below.

❤️Set an intention to Step into Spring with a Spring❤️

Jane x

#yogarascal #iambe #parentingrascal

Whooo Cares

Lessons from a Wise Owl

What does it feel like to you when your relationships are in balance, you are relaxed and calm, you have clarity,  focus, confidence, connection and you get thing done efficiently with few power struggles?

This weekend I’ve been on a truly special Connected Communications Course created and run by the wonderful and wise Lis Cashin –  2 days with very inspirational women exploring Lis’ R.E.A.L approach.

Meditation on an Owl

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Since I was a young child I’ve been fascinated with Owls, I often hear them and see them and it’s only in the last couple of years that I incorporate them into my meditation practice. I ponder them silently  and wisely watching, sensing, blinking and still, behaviours I am aware of and try to embody throughout the day.

By coming from this space of stillness and quiet we have time to notice our breath, observe and respond with grace.  I wrote more about this a couple of weeks ago – take a breath.

This links in nicely with aspects of  Lis’ R.E.A.L approach,  and I’m really excited to be weaving this into my IamBe practice with children, adults, business and families.

Whooo Cares

Practice being an owl, you might look a bit of a twit but whoo cares.

Jane x
Giving You A Powerful Voice, Vision and Choices

Why not join our Meet Up group where we run a number of events & meet ups across the year for adults, kids, businesses and families.

You might also enjoy Aypee’s blog  BE SAY DO HAVE

 

Shrove Tuesday – Do you give a Toss?

What is Shrove Tuesday?

Going through this week’s calendar and getting organised, I note it’s pancake day on Tuesday. I’ve taught the meaning of this to kids over the years in different schools, and remember that the word  shrove is linked to being shriven from sin. In past times there was a call to confession with the pancake bell.

Fasting

Some research suggests that people used up their store cupboard ingredients in the pancakes,  so they were eaten before the 40 fasting period of Lent. Other reading points to the ingredients having pagan symbolism.

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I feel so bad

In my youthful, naive, fresh teaching days I used to talk to the children about giving up things for Lent, ‘so kids what are you going to give up, what sins/wrongs are you committing that need to be put right?’ now I’d say ‘what’s going right for you that you could explore further, what value could you add to others?’

Stop beating yourself up

Giving up things just makes us think of them even more and we might even start to crave them and then feel ‘bad’ when we give in.  I’m rather bored of either feeling good and bad and hearing talk of feeling guilty because I ate this or did that. I’d rather not teach kids to beat themselves up. Let’s teach them about balance.  I wrote about a blog about developing an abundance mindset here.untitled-design-5

How can we ‘add’ more value?

My 10 year old daughter sometimes tells me she’s fat. I’ve been so careful about only celebrating our bodies, I’ve never spoken of going on a diet or asked whether my bum looks big in this.  Yet she’s picking up messages about image from all around – school, the TV, books etc. I ask her what can she do more of that’s good for her, what does she enjoy, what makes her feel good and importantly I need to role model this myself. 

Happy Tossing.

Movement, Mindset and Mindfulness Classes for kids starting on Shrove Tuesday – Movement, Mindfulness & Mindset for Kids

Jane x

 

 

A Bored Book.

A ‘Bored’ Book

How many times a day do your children tell you they are bored?

Maybe you have children who can easily entertain themselves, and spend the day just making, creating and playing, I’d really love to hear from you for this idea.

I notice that if kids are on their computers, tablets, phones, PS4s etc they never seem to tire.  It’s when they come off them that they find it hard to transition from this over stimulated time to a space where they now have to do something ‘boring’ instead.

Screens produce an experience we can’t recreate

I read once that when we are on our screens, certain chemicals are released – maybe it was dopamine or seratonin – that can’t be recreated in the brain at the same levels once we come off.  For example, as a teacher, I cannot replicate the multisensory stimulation that a screen induces, hence children don’t always listen so well, sit still, retain information and they get bored quicker, however if I put on a YouTube clip explaining the same thing, they are all eyes, ears and interest for a long time, it is their language.

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This photo was taken when we were in Africa. These kids played and collaborated endlessly with the tyre, they had no screens.

What do kids do when they aren’t on screens?

My son had a friend over, they’d had some screen time together and the hour timer was up, so after a few reminders they came off and didn’t know what to do. They asked to go back on again and we said no that they could go and find something else. This  quite often means they go round the friend’s house to play on the screens there instead.

It took them about 10 minutes to transition to outdoor play and they soon found themselves engaged in a nerf gun war, followed by fire building with Paul in the garden. With the screens off, they had to find something to do, it’s so easy though sometimes to just let them go back on again and loose track of time. They might mope about inbetween waiting for their next fix.  Meanwhile, we also bury our faces in Facebook, Twitter, Gmail etc, driven to distraction.

Why are we so Bored?

We know it’s good to be bored, creativity often stems from boredom and head space. Why though are we so bored? Some say we are over-stimulated, the more we have the more we need and it’s hard to put up with the slow stuff in between. Are you reading this whilst doing or thinking about other things at the same time?  Or maybe it’s too long and boring to even read. Our kids are no different.

A ‘bored’ book for kids written by kids.

I’d like to create an e-book of ideas for kids of things to do when they aren’t on their screens. I’d love your children to contribute to this please, and if they are willing to, could you share their ideas in the comments below with an image if possible of the activity.  I’ll obviously give them a credit.  All ages welcome.

Things to do that are free, with little or no adult intervention.  I wonder if we they can come up with 3 or more boring ideas?

Jane x

janetyson.co.uk

What did you have for lunch, who did you play with?

Did you eat all your peas and carrots…

Would you like your child to speak to you more and share their feelings openly and freely with you without asking? Read on as this will help.

Scenario 1 – you greet your child after a busy day and ask them all about it – who they played with, what they had for lunch, did they eat all their peas and carrots, what they did in maths, have they got homework and so. You ask them question after question (some parents I spoke to say they question like this because they feel they ‘ought’ to).

Scenario 2– your child is playing with for example their lego, you go over to join in and begin to take over. Maybe you want the bricks to match, the windows aren’t in the right place, and the door opens the wrong way.  You start to question and probe and join in with their play in a rather controlling way.  The child soon looses interest, walks off and you start to worry about their lack of commitment and connection!

Scenario 3 – your teen is in their room, the door is closed they are on their screen, you haven’t had a conversation in a while.

Do any of these sound familiar to you?

Let’s Rewind the Scenes

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How could you just enjoy being ‘alongside’ them?

‘There once was a wise man who said nothing’

How about you just sit there with them, in the moment and just be and not actually do anything. That’s right just be quiet. Breathe, sit and be with them. It might be hard not to talk and take over – so practice. They’ve been over-stimulated, over stretched and haven’t stopped all day, their brains are full!  Allow them a break.  It’s OK to be quiet, allow yourself to be quiet too.

Reframe the situation, what can we learn from the child, what are they teaching us about being in the moment? Notice them.

Soon, they will start to enjoy your peaceful presence and invite you into their space and start to engage with you.  You may even find they start to guide you with what to do, ask you questions and  even tell you things that are on their mind because you have allowed them some space and time alongside you, they feel free and safe to express themselves.   Resist asking them too much and taking over, enjoy being childlike with them for a while. With older children you may say something like I’m just going to come and sit with you for a while, so you watch them on their screen for 10 minutes or so, again you don’t need to speak you are just alongside them, see what happens you will be surprised.

Little and often.

To a Child Love Is Spelled T-I-M-E (1)

IamBe Approach

Are you wanting a little guidance and support to help you to communicate and connect within your family? I am an IamBe Master Practitioner, more details about what I do are over on my Linked-In page here which includes a full list of workshops including our ‘BE SAY DO HAVE’ Ⓒ Contented Parenting model here.

Jane Tyson x

Whilst at University studying Education and Child Psychology,  I volunteered with various ‘play’ schemes and trained as a ‘Play Leader’ alongside children in mainstream and special educational need settings from 4 to 18. These experiences led me into Primary School teaching and yoga and mindfulness for families.  My stepmother and two step sisters are both play therapists, so I’ve been pretty immersed and passionate about play for 25 years, well 45.  

Core Process – Exploring Play.