Happy Kids – What’s Reslience Got to Do With It?

Happy Kids – What’s Reslience Got To Do With It? 

Being a parent is the most challenging job any of us will have!   

This session is designed for curious parents who would like to explore ways they can give their child fresh possibilities to adapt to the challenges of life.

In this 3 hour session you will learn ways to – 

  • Teach your child how to adapt to frustrating times. Become their life mentor.
  • Help your child’s learning experience to become easier and more effective 
  • Become aware which parenting styles get the best for you and your children
  • Elicit calm responses with your child when you have to communicate topics which could be stressful 
  • Improve their self esteem
  • Develop enjoyable loving sibling relationships

family dialogues

My workshops respond to the group dyanamic, hence they are ‘flexible’.  Take away your learning, practice and personalise it to suit your family. Come back to learn and practice some more to create together a family that can cope with change, pick themselves up and move on with everyday challenges.

Happy Parents, Happy Kids. 

£50.

The first 3 and repeating customers will enjoy our special rate of £30 

It will be held in Guildford.

I also offer one to one programmes and support, and Skype sessions.  

Find me on Linked In –  JaneTyson.co.uk 

I’m a mum, teacher of 20 years in private, public and international settings, have a BA Hons in Education and Psychology. teach meditation and yoga to children and families and have a Life Long Passion in exploring ‘What Makes People Tick’.  

Guildford, Surrey – Book Here

Feedback from my workshops  –

‘Excellent workshop, well structured offering practical advise in an understanding and nurturing environment’

‘I just wanted to say thank you for your great advice during last workshop. Now every time I’m about to react instead of respond I see you tapping your nose and I take a deep breath’.

‘Really enjoyed the workshop and felt like I have some good ideas to remind me to be in the right frame of mind when dealing with my children’s emotions and behaviours’

‘I enjoyed the atmosphere of helping each other, suggestions and reminders’

‘It’s clear that Jane practices what she teaches’

‘A great workshop which helped me to look for ways to create a more peaceful and happy environment with my children’

‘Jane was friendly and informative. Sharing great ideas to make a happier household’

‘Thank you for the inspiration’

‘A very interesting and straight forward approach’

‘Jane was very knowledgeable and enthusiastic and keen to help’

‘The workshop was very interactive with great relevant content’

#frustrationexpert  #randdialevent

 

 

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Listening, do we have time?

#antibullyingweek

I was bullied at my primary school for quite a while by a girl in my class. I used to go home with scratches and bruises and she’d verbally abuse me throughout the day.

She had her own problems going on at home and her frustrations were directed at me and others too.

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Do you feel like you have a voice?

How has it impacted me? Well it definitely made me stronger and I’m sure I didn’t just sit back and always stay quiet. Upon reflection, nobody at the school ever sat down to listen to us together. It always seemed to get dealt with separately and never seriously, I don’t remember ever receiving support or guidance at school throughout and it always happened when nobody else was in sight that she’d do it.

We weren’t taught to say how we both felt or express ourselves confidently and hear each other. I didn’t really know how to or feel safe nor courageous enough.  She clearly was crying out for help.

This was quite a while back and I know schools have tighter policies and procedures in place now.

Do you have enough courage?

Over the past 20 years teaching, kids have come to me and said ‘oh so and so said this or that’ etc Quite often I’ll say well did you tell them you don’t like it or let them know how you feel? They’ll often say no, they just got used to an adult fixing the problem for them and didn’t have the courage always to stand up for themselves.

We do a lot of role play in class, even with 4 year olds, to express how we feel and what we want.

Adults can make a big difference

In 1998, I was teaching a Year 3 class with a group girls who constantly fell out. In the end I used to invite them in at lunch for 10 minute conversations where I’d facilitate, so they could hear one another and we’d could role play different scenarios and choices. I was surprised at what a difference this made just giving them a space to each be heard with an adult just there for them. It really did improve things, so I continue to use this approach even with my own kids, but they do still have big fall outs it’s the recovery time that interests me, how do we bounce back and move on and learn from things? How can we respond rather than react, we always have a choice.

Oh I haven’t got time for all that 

A while ago, my son had a few weeks of being in trouble, one day where it went really wrong with so many adults being involved and each telling him off. I said to the teacher, well have you actually sat down to listen to what he has to say and just allow him to speak, even if what he has done is wrong, might it be good to look at other ways he could have behaved and coach him a little?

‘Well, I haven’t got time for all that‘ said the teacher.

Listening, do we have time?

Just some Tuesday musings.

randomdialogues.com

Glugs Wine, Listens to Silence

Are you Tuned in?

Just imagine being together as a family and really listening to each other, responding, and emotionally tuning in. Can you hand on heart say you do this, that nobody is distracted by anything else going on? You are truly present and in the moment… ah nice.  Then the kids have a disagreement, it escalates, and it all goes horribly wrong, (keeping it real) and it does, let’s face it.  What do you do in the eye of the storm – mum or dad in the middle?  Is their argument a result of unresolved conflict,which the kids are too upset about and maybe too immature to let go of.  Perhaps, they haven’t had a space to talk about their upset or be listened to?  Does it ever feel just a little like groundhog day?

ear

Decline in Listening Skills 

Research has found a significant decrease in children’s listening skills over the past decade,  can you guess why? I wonder too if this doesn’t apply to adults and sitting together as a family.  I’ve put together a ‘listening’ programme which  I’m sharing with the children and colleagues  I teach alongside  in school.

Meanwhile, parent(s) finishes meal and glugs more wine and enjoys listening to silence, and tunes out. Silent is listen rearranged.

What do you DO after a family UPSET, how does it leave you feeling and what’s that like?

What do you Need?

How do we create time for family connection, spaces to talk to one another and be heard?

Today, just become AWARE of the above.  And Pause. (a previous blog about Pausing) .  I have a photo of an owl, which reminds me to  listen, notice and be wise. Often, I think of the owl when I have a quiet time or meditate. Perhaps imagery will help you too?

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I’ll share listening ideas on my social media page this week. @FrustrationExpert

I hear you

So right now what do you need? What can make family life calmer?

Each month, I’m  creating a regular morning of family connection which will respond to your needs and those of your  family, it will be ‘agile’ and ‘flexible’ and at the moment in Guildford, venue tbc. I hear you.

What do you like best?

What could help you to disconnect from all the busyness of life, to be more present and bonded as a family? Have a read of this link here  and see what you like best about the mornings. Come along with your children to learn some of these simple skills and take them away to use with your family between sessions. You will feel more relaxed, more present to listen and this will filter across family life. Plus they’ll be ongoing support for you between meet ups. If your children prefer not to join you then come by yourself, as I’ll share ideas for you to use at home. 

Seeking Open Hearts & Curious Minds

Please do share this with any family you think would benefit from joining us. I’ve not specified ages, just a willingness to give it a go with an open heart and curious mind.

Jane x

#frustrationexpert

‘Miss, The Elephants’

Ladybird Ladybird 

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‘Please put that back where you found it,  hurry up and get back into line,’ words shouted to a 6 year old child in a school I was teaching in a while ago. The little girl had a ladybird in the palm of her hand and was showing it to a friend.  She set the ladybird free and lined up in the straight line with all the other children.

‘Miss, the elephant’ 

A teaching mentor once advised me ‘Don’t be the teacher who misses the elephant walking past the classroom’

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When I was teaching in Tanzania, we often had monkeys visiting the classroom, no matter how many times they came in to steal crumbs from the floor the kids got distracted and excited. At the time, I was also studying to ‘BE’ a mindfulness teacher and completing a yoga teaching course, so despite feeling irritated,  I reminded myself to be present with the experience, have a 10431412_10152530791344789_4232260385897800258_obeginners mind with the visits and to see them through the children’s fresh curious eyes!

The children also used to love the large birds that perched on the telephone wires outside and sometimes we’d all just stand by the windows watching them. We’d find out what they were called, researching the photos in our small collection of bird spotting books and of course if the electricity and internet were working we’d use google.

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Lessons From the Ladybird

After the ladybird was set free,  I went back to class to tell my children about it and found out what they knew about them.  We looked at photos online of  different ladybirds, found out where they lived,  counted the different spots and introduced the word symmetry, little children love big words and there’s so many avenues still to explore. We added this learning to the slug, snails and power ranger interest zone.

Monkey Minds

Often I talk with the children about their busy monkey minds, and teach them ways to settle and calm ourselves, largely because I ‘need’ them to be quiet on the carpet.  Kids are naturally curious, playful and present, are we teaching them to be busy, distracted and stressed?

I Missed the Elephant

Whilst typing this I forgot to pay attention, the birds have been singing outside all the while and I didn’t notice –  I missed the elephant.

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Seize the day.

A PLAYce to BE

I’m facilitating a PLAYce to BE You on the 14th October at Clandon Wood near Guildford in Surrey. You might like to join in and notice the beautiful nature reserve with us. Why not come along and take a couple of hours out to just BE. Info here. 

If you would like me to come and talk to your organisation about simple ways to get present, please email me jane@janetyson.co.uk.

#frustrationexpert

A PLAYce to BE

A PLAYce to BE.
 
The essence of creativity comes from play which feeds and nurtures our souls‘ Goldie Hawn.
 
This afternoon I’m running my ‘Playful / Random’ workshop at Clandon Wood.
 
My intention is to create a monthly ‘space’ for 8 adults (big kids) and a PLAYce to explore ways to BE – to relax, play, share, support and create.
#frustrationexpert
 

Today, we will –

  • learn ways we can be more connected to self, friends and family
  • explore how to listen more effectively
  • take a short mindful Autumn walk
  • draw a little
  • write a poem
  • create an Autumn mandala
  • understand the ‘upward spiral’ for good mental health
  • breathe
  • do the Hokey Cokey!
It’s from 2.30pm to 4.30pm today at the beautiful nature reserve and natural burial ground Clandon Wood.
 
We will also ‘eat beautifully’ – I’ll provide teas and healthy snacks.
 
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Come along to see what magic we can create together.
 
 
It’s random.
 
Jane x
 
#RandDialEvent #LWWDEvent #Frustrationexpert

Adults stop playing because they worry they might fall over.

A Lesson From the Brownies 

Another ‘Random’ workshop with the Brownies this evening.
 
Before we did some moves, mindset and mindlessness, I did a little research for my ‘adult’ playful / random / mindlessful workshop this Saturday and asked them 3 questions –
 

What does the word ‘play’ mean to you? –

 
Friends
Games
Tablet
Donuts
 

‘Why Do Adults Stop Playing’?

 
Because of us
They haven’t got time
They give up
They can’t play, don’t know how to
Too old to be chased
Worried about falling over
We are faster than them and they get frustrated they can’t keep up
 

‘Why Do You Like To Play?’

 
  • Relax
  • Fun
  • Exercise
  • Problems go away
  • Builds Imagination
  • Reminds us that fun is important
  • Laughter is the best medicine
  • Gives us something to do
Adults what do you reckon to the Brownies list?
 
Next week I’m with teens at a Youth Club
brownies
link up with me at – janetyson.co.uk

What Will You Settle On Today?

What will you settle on today?

Some people love being preoccupied with thoughts.

Thoughts provide them with constant entertainment, interaction, they believe thinking is important.

They are addicted to distraction and fearful of boredom, inner silence, or feeling alone without them.

Our minds are often likened to busy monkeys leaping from tree to tree or butterflies fluttering from flower to flower.

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We are good at multitasking, reacting, and scanning for the pleasant, unpleasant or neutral and choosing all the time between them.

Life is fast paced, work is busy, families are doing, schools are cramming…

So what can we settle on today to stabilise our mind and respond more to situations?

How can we allow the butterfly to settle, the monkey to still?

Jane Tyson